Raw is War
January 25, 1999
As the sold out America West Arena crowd looked on, Shane McMahon introduced the winner of the 1999 Royal Rumble--Vincent K. McMahon! The owner had a lot on his mind one day after his big win at the Rumble. First he said that he was so appreciative that The Rock came down and watched as he "single handedly" threw Stone Cold out that he was going to give the new champion the $100,000 bounty that was reserved for the superstar that eliminated Austin. Secondly, he said that since he didn't want The Rock "to be intimidated" about the prospect of facing him at WrestleMania, he had filed papers that official withdrew him from his spot as number one contender. He said he, and only he, would name the new number one contender who would face The Rock at WrestleMania.
Suddenly, Stone Cold Steve Austin appeared on the Titan Tron via satellite from San Antonio, Texas. The Rattlesnake told Mr. McMahon, "I'm going to WrestleMania to face the champion". How did he know? The Commissioner himself said so! It turned out the Rattlesnake was at the home of Shawn Michaels, who was healing up from back surgery a few weeks ago.
Michaels explained that him and Austin had been going through the rule book and discovered that if the winner of the Royal Rumble was unable or unwilling to go to WrestleMania, the runner up would go instead. When Mr. McMahon officially signed away his rights as number one contender, he unknowingly allowed Austin to go in his place! Upon hearing the news the owner was irate.
Austin admitted that he made a mistake at the Rumble when he decided to punish Mr. McMahon instead of throwing him out. He explained, "I think I might want to beat the living hell out of you, even more than I want the title". He challenged the owner to a match at the next Pay-Per-View, St. Valentine's Day Massacre, and said if Mr. McMahon could beat him, he could strip Austin of his title as number one contender. Since there was no way for Mr. McMahon to pin Austin or make him submit, Austin said he'd make it a cage match. That way, Mr. McMahon could win simply by doing what he does best: run.
Before gulping down a few more beers with HBK back in San Antonio, Austin guaranteed that he would beat Mr. McMahon "all over that damn cage, I will walk all over your limp bloody carcass, and Stone Cold Steve Austin will walk right into WrestleMania and beat The Rock"!
Still nursing a sore left leg, Badd Ass Billy Gunn faced Goldust in singles competition. Gunn came out with fellow DX members Chyna and Triple H. The leader of DX said, "I doubt you made Mankind say 'I Quit', and I damn sure know you can't make me say it". He challenged the new champion to an "I Quit" title match on RAW!
As the match got underway, Goldust's music started playing again. A blue Goldust look-a-like came out--it was the Blue Meanie, aka Bluedust! Bluedust grabbed Head and clobbered Goldust with it, allowing Badd Ass to get the pin!
The Oddities came to the ring, but their festivities were interrupted by The Rock! The Corporate Champion first told the Oddities to leave and then officially accepted Triple H's challenge. Backstage, an armored truck carrying $100,000 in cash had pulled up. Mankind attacked the security guards and took the $100,000! He marched out toward the ring and started throwing large portions of it to the fans.
Mankind said he may have been unconscious, but he did not remember saying "I Quit". He said he and the "very talented production team" had got together and solved the mystery. It turns out the Corporation had taped Mankind saying he would make The Rock say "I Quit" during HEAT, and used the tape of him saying "I Quit" when he lay unconscious at the Rumble!
To entertain the "millions and millions of bored people during halftime of the big game", Mankind challenged The Rock to a match in an empty arena during "Halftime Heat" on January 31!
The Oddities came out again, and this time Droz took on George "The Animal" Steele. The Animal customarily went munching on the turnbuckle, allowing Droz to get the pin. But the former Denver Bronco was not content at just getting a victory, as he continued to assault the Hall of Famer after the bell!
The Tag Team Championship was on the line as Owen Hart and Jeff Jarrett, accompanied by Debra, challenged Ken Shamrock and Big Bossman. Before the match got underway, Kevin Kelly interviewed Debra, who said that no man could resist her. "Sexual Chocolate" interrupted the interview and said no woman could resist him. There seemed to be a spark between the two. Once the match got underway, the corporate champions did everything they could to keep their attention away from Debra. Shamrock even got the ankle lock on Owen. But the Blue Blazer appeared and clobbered Shamrock with a guitar, knocking him cold. Owen made the cover, and he and Jarrett became the new World Wrestling Federation Tag Team Champions! (It appears that the Blue Blazer has been vacationing somewhere tropical. He has put on a great deal of weight and has a deep, dark tan--real dark!)
After the break, Shane McMahon and the stooges came out. Shane said Kane had apologized to the McMahon family last night at the Rumble, but now Shane wanted a public apology! Kane came out and said "I apologize" in front of the world. However, that wasn't good enough for the owner's son, and he demanded that Kane get on his knees and say he was sorry. Before the Big Red Machine could do that, X-Pac's music played and out came the European Champion. The degenerate told Kane to stop taking Corporate Crap and instead come and join DX. He then told Shane that he would take him on! However, the Big Red Machine grabbed him from behind and chokeslammed him! He threw him in the corner and Shane hit him with the Bronco Buster, the same move X-Pac had done on him just a few weeks before!
Val Venis and Test faced off next, but before the match got underway, the adult film star debuted his latest video, "Saving Ryan's Privates". Ryan turned out to be Ken Shamrock's sister! After Test threw Val outside the ring, Shamrock ran out and clobbered him with a steel chair. The Corporate Insurance Policy hit Val with his patented finishing move and got the three count. Shamrock went after Venis again just after the match, and Billy Gunn made the save. However, Venis apparently did not know who hit him-he suspected it was Badd Ass himself-and the adult film star attacked Gunn!
In a hardcore rules tag team match, Al Snow and Road Dogg faced Gangrel and Edge of the Brood. After making their entrance, Snow and Dogg grabbed a couple fire extinguishers, and use them to put out Gangrel's customary ring of fire. The four superstars did not even bother to go to the ring. Instead the used various object lying around the backstage area to pummel each other. With Road Dogg and Snow standing against a fence, the Brood rolled a Dumpster toward them, sandwiching them between the Dumpster and the fence. Later Gangrel put Road Dogg through a table, and assaulted both competitors repeatedly with a chair. They even battled into the ladies' room, sending the Godfather's hos running. All four of them went through another table, and Road Dogg and Al landed on top and got the pin! Just before going through the table, "Bluedust" reunited Head with Al Snow!
Backstage, Kevin Kelly interviewed the winners of the match. Al Snow challenged Road Dogg to a Hardcore Championship match, and just as Road Dogg accepted, the Ministry of Darkness attacked both superstars!
The Rock fought his second "I Quit" title match in as many nights as he took on Triple H! The Rock placed the ring bell over HHH's head and dropped the Corporate Elbow. But Triple H recovered and hit The Rock with the Pedigree. Then he dragged him outside and Pedigreed him again! Still, he didn't wasn't done as he picked up the champion and put him on the announcer's table. He was about to Pedigree him through the table when members of the Corporate came out and took Chyna hostage! Bossman told Triple H to say "I Quit" or Kane would break the Ninth Wonder of the World's neck! Triple H agreed and The Rock retained the title. HHH came in the ring and was face to face with Kane when Chyna shocked the world when she hit Triple H with a low blow from behind! As RAW came to an end, Chyna was embracing Shane and Mr. McMahon!