WCW Nitro

The Ice Palace, Tampa, Florida
June 29, 1998

We see an 18-wheeler driving down the road, as Tony goes into a conniption. DDP and Malone are making their way to the arena....

And we're live from The Ice Palace in Tampa, FL, with WCW Monday Nitro!

As a side note, loyal reader Aldo "Don't call me 'Montoya'" D. is in attendance tonight.

The Nitro Girls come out to "jiggle."

Tenay wonders what surprise DDP and Malone will be bringing tonight, after being on the road so long. They'll probably just have to pee really, really bad.

Mean Gene calls out "Mr. Interview" Kevin Greene for a repeat performance Greene gets a better reception than he did in Jacksonville. Greene doesn't want to talk about football. Actually, I take that back, Greene's getting booed. Greene invokes the Name of the Goldberg, and a Goldberg chant starts. Greene says that he and Goldberg will face Hennig and Giant at the PPV. I hadn't heard....

Match 1: Kanyon pinned Horace (w/Lodi) after the Flatliner Horace comes out with Lodi Lodi sign: "Horace: Stop Sign Swinger" Yes! He'll be facing Kanyon!!! Kanyon's one ugly mutha. But he's got some of the best technical skills I've ever seen. Kanyon with a big shoulderblock, followed by a FISHERMAN SUPLEX NECKBREAKER!!!! Sheesh! That ruled! Kanyon pounds on Horace in the corner. Kanyon with a form of a facebuster into a two-count. Kanyon intimidates Lodi, but gets clotheslined over the top by Horace. Horace dives through the ropes and hits Kanyon. Horace sets the Stop sign against the guardrail. Horace throws Kanyon into the Stop sign. Kanyon doesn't Stop. That's two points on his license. Horace with a bodyslam back in the ring, and drops the elbow. Horace puts Kanyon on the top, and superplexes him off. Kanyon blocks a hiptoss and hits a swinging neckbreaker. Kanyon with a pancake out of the fireman's carry for two. Kanyon decks Lodi, but gets met with a big foot from Horace. Horace goes for his Lariat, but Kanyon turns it into the Flatliner for the win! The Flock comes in, but Kanyon cleans house. Kanyon puts Kidman in a torture rack neckbreaker!! Riggs comes in to get the advantage for the Flock. Raven comes in and blathers, and Evenflows Kanyon.

We get to see the normal Nitro opener now.

We get to hear portions of DDP's phone call from Thunder where he promised both a big rig and a surprise.

We see another helicopter shot of the 18-wheeler driving. Kinda like OJ meets "BJ and the Bear."

In the back, nWo Hollywood is arming themselves with crowbars, pipes, and chains, to get ready for the truck.

We get to see more "fan reaction" to the tag match.

More Mean Gene, this time calling out Stevie Ray Stevie says that he has a problem with "dat pipsqueak" Chris Benoit, and the ex-football player, non-wrestling partner of his. Stevie says he can beat both of 'em one-on-one if he wants to, but Booker T wants a tag match. Stevie says that Booker T is in agreement, because they're Harlem Heat. Stevie wants a Harlem Heat/Benoit & Mongo match tonight.

Match 2: Little Dragon pinned Eddie Guerrero with a rollup Some sort of funky music brings out the Little Dragon. Little Dragon looks to be a little shorter than Mark "Shooter" Curtis. His opponent - Steven Wright's favorite wrestler, Eddie Guerrero. Guerrero looks a little less dejected, but he's looking over his shoulder for Chavo. Sign: "C-H-A-V-O and Chavo was his name-o! Come on little trooper!" Eddie flexes his pecs to the crowd. Eddie motions that the crowd can "kiss his ass" Eddie does the step-and-twist on Dragon's face. Dragon hits a spinning armdrag. Double-handspring-back-elbow from the Itsy Bitsy Dragon. HUGE tilt-a-whirl backbreaker from Eddie. Eddie goes to work on the back. Eddie with his slingshot somersault headbutt on Dragon's back. Eddie drops the Dragon with a brainbuster. They need Jimmy Garvin to show 'em how it's done. Chavo runs out with a hobby horse, shouting encouragement to Eddie. Chavo calls his horse "Peppi" Eddie's distracted by Chavo and Peppi. Chavo: "You'll have to excuse me, I'm feeling a little hoarse." Eddie takes the horse, with Chavo shouting "Horse thief! Horse thief!" Little Dragon takes this chance to roll Eddie up, and gets the win! Eddie whacks Dragon with the horse, sending the horse head into the crowd. Chavo retrieves the pieces of Peppi. Eddie leaps over the ropes, and chases Chavo to the back.

In the back, Chris Jericho is offering Ultimo Dragon a title shot if Dragon beats Dean Malenko tonight.

The Nitro Girls come down through the crowd. Zbysko, on AC Jazz: "Shake it, you little blue-eyed goddess."

This week's Nitro Party winner; two guys from San Francisco Our first Hispanic Nitro party winner, though not our first "fat boy" winner.

Match 3: Giant (w/Rick Rude and Curt Hennig) pinned Judo Suwa and Sumo Fuji after the Chokeslam Sumo Fuji and Judo Suwa will be in a handicap match against.... Big Tobacco! Phil Morris comes out with Hennig and Rude, but without a cigarette. Sign: "Hogan Needs Rogaine." Hennig pals around with Wade Boggs in the crowd. Sumo Fuji tries slapping Giant, but it has no effect. Judo Suwa tries an armdrag, but Giant doesn't budge. Both men charge Giant, but both get met with a chokeslam. Giant pins both men. Hennig and Rude work over the losers Hennig gives Fuji a "wedgie" as he throws him out of the ring. Hennig gets on the mic, and says "You people got a problem? Bring it right now." Hennig talks smack about Greene and Goldberg. Greene comes halfway down the aisle, and Hennig challenges him. Greene charges, and Goldberg follows from behind. Greene tackles Hennig, gets hit by Rude, and the heels flee as Goldberg hits the ring. Big Goldberg chant. The question: Was it live, or was it "Memorex." Maybe Aldo D. can clue us in next week.

Hogan's music comes on. Hogan and Bischoff come out. Hogan's got a chain around his neck, and is playing the World title belt like a guitar. He might as well, that's about all it's good for these days. When was the last title defense?Tony and Tenay talk about how the owner of the Tampa Bay Lightning was a bit foolish for proclaiming their top draft choice in the NHL draft as a "future hall of famer." before he'd even played one game in the big leagues. [cough]Goldberghype[cough]. Bischoff and Hogan blather in "truck" metaphors. Hogan talks about Port Tampa, FL. He insinuates that he's from there. I don't know if he is or not, probably so. Hogan looks especially constipated tonight. His face is scrunched up a an interesting pattern. Bischoff talks smack about Malone choking in the NBA finals. Hogan refers to Rodman as the "Black Jesus." Now, I'm personally not "rabidly religious," but that's kinda sketchy. Sign: "I Need A Girlfriend"

More pictures from "on the road"

Match 4: Sting and Lex Luger defeated British Bulldog and Jim Niedhart when Sting pinned Bulldog after the Scorpion Death Drop Bulldog and Neidhart come down. Commercial. A bit of advice for WCW: If the WWF is coming off a Pay-Per-View, with a live RAW, after they've beaten you in the ratings for a month, DO NOT oppose the start of RAW with the British frickin' Bulldog and Jim "The fickin' Anvil" Neidhart, I don't care WHO they're facing! Wolfpac music brings out Sting and Luger. Sting has a "Wolf Pack" hankie. Sting and Luger have the tag belts. This is a non-title match. The former Hart Foundation memebers grab the belts, and hold them aloft. Luger and Sting throw their shirts to the crowd. Neidhart and Bulldog are playing the heels. Luger with the headlock, and Neidhart tries a powerslam. Luger falls on him. It's the Bulldog in, and he wants Sting. Lots of stalling so far. Sting sends Bulldog outside. Luger tags in, and flexes to the Bulldog. Neidhart tags back in. So does Sting, who clotheslines Neidhart. Neidhart gets doubleteamed in the corner by the faces. However, the former Harts use doubleteaming to their advantage, too. Luger ducks a clothesline, and both men clothesline each other. Sting and Bulldog tag in, and Sting hits a Stinger Splash. Luger sends Neidhart to the floor. Bulldog tries to pick Sting up for the Running Powerslam, but Sting slips out and hits the Scorpion Death Drop for the win.

Match 5: Saturn pinned Reese (w/Lodi) after the Death Valley Driver The Siren Song brings out Saturn. He'll be facing Reese. Reese takes the early power advantage. Reese with a series of backbreakers. Reese with a knee in the corner. Saturn kicks Reese as Reese charges the corner. Saturn goes to work on the knees, and goes up top. Saturn hits a missile dropkick, and Superkicks Lodi on the apron. Sheesh! Saturn hits the Death Valley Driver on Reese! Saturn challenges the Flock, and they attack. Sick Boy, Horace, and Kidman take over, and Raven comes in. Raven says that it's Saturn's fault that his life's sucked. Raven delivers an Evenflow to Saturn.

Sorry if was a little distracted during that last match, but Steve Regal has just debuted on RAW. I normally don't flip between the two shows, but I really dig that guy. Ok....I'm back now. He beat Darren Drosdov with the Move Formerly Known as the Regal Stretch.

Footage from Greene/Goldberg/nWo last week.

STILL more footage from the 18-wheeler driving.

The Nitro Girls come out to shake their "thangs"

Match 6: El Vampiro pinned Brad Armstrong after The Nail in the Coffin Someone I haven't seen before: El Vampiro, from Toronto, Canada. Yes! My man, Brad Armstrong! If they make Brad job to this joker...... Vamp looks like a junkie. Armstrong with a headlock, armtwist, hammerlock, and takedown. Vamp flips out of an Armstrong monkey flip, but gets flipped by an Armstrong clothesline. Vamp hits a twisting kick that floors Da Man. Spinwheel kick from the wacky undead guy. Heenan: "Vampy should get home before sunup." Armstrong slams Vamp's head into the mat. Brad drops too quick for a backdrop, and gets kicked down. Vampiro quickly picks Armstrong up in a bodyslam position and drops him with a version of the JuviDriver for the win. Damnit damnit damnit. Tenay informs us that Vamp calls that move "The Nail in the Coffin."

They've got some band out in the aisle, and we see a picture that says "nWo Late Hour still to come." Oh dear God no....not nWo Nitro II....

We come back with the band playing....

Match 7: Alex Wright and Disco Inferno defeated Shiima Nabunaga and Tokyo Magnum when Wright pinned Magnum after a reverse neckbreaker Shiima Nabunaga and Tokyo Magnum make an appearance. They'll be facing the new WCW Tag Team - The Dancin' Fools. Disco Inferno comes out first, Wright second. Disco and Alex dance in the aisle. Then they dance in the ring, and Tokyo Magnum joins them. The Fools take offense, and pitch Magnum. Nabunaga quickly joins his partner. I don't know why they're pushing Disco so hard as a heel when he's one of the few effective faces WCW has. Wright and Shiima start off with armbars and flips. Some mat wrestling early on. Nice dropkick by Nabunaga. Wright hits a running European uppercut. Double-facedrop by the Fools. Disco drops the People's Fist. Disco tries to run Nabunaga into the corner, but he slips out and dropkicks Disco in the back. Modified bulldog by Magnum. Disco avoids Magnum's dropkick, and tags Wright. Wright hits a standing powerslam, but gets knees to the gut on his slingshot splash. Nabunaga hits Disco with a spinwheel kick, and a slingshot headbutt! Magnum tags in and works Disco over. Magnum goes up top, but slips. He goes back up again, and hits a SuperFrankensteiner. Magnum dances, and gets hit with a Wright missile dropkick. Disco hits a kind of bulldog-kneelift. Wright tags in and hits a reverse neckbreaker for the win. They argue over whose music should play, and the music guy alternates the two's themes for them. Sign: "Tampa is Brisco Bros. Country". Doh!

Mike Tenay is out again interviewing pre-teens about the Bash main event.

Match 8: Ultimo Dragon defeated Dean Malenko by countout It's Cruiserwieght time! Ultimo Dragon comes out first.... We see footage from the Jericho/Dragon/Malenko situation on Thunder. Speak of the Malenko, and he shall appear. Malenko with an armlock to start. Lots of reversals, and both men miss a dropkick. Some incredible mat wrestling to start that will probably have the crowd chanting "boring" within minutes. A shame. Dragon works the leg. Malenko becomes the first man I've seen NOT to fall for Dragon's headstand dropkick. Dragon flips out of a backdrop, and hits his Dragon Kicks. Malenko avoids an Asai Moonsault, and Dragon slaps on the Dragon Sleeper! Malenko knees Dragon in the head to get out. Dragon with a rollup for two. Dragon hits a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker. Handspring back-elbow from the Dragon, who puts Malenko up top. Malenko catches him, and hits the EXPLODING GUTBUSTER! Malenko applies the Texas Cloverleaf! Jericho comes out yelling at Malenko, and says "Isn't this Tampa, isn't this where your father is buried?" Malenko immediately drops the hold and chases Jericho to the back, allowing the Dragon to win via countout.

We're back with Hour Number Three!

We see the footage from Arn Anderson and Chris Benoit last week.

Match 9: Steve McMichael and Chris Benoit defeated Harlem Heat when McMichael pinned Booker T Yes yes yes....no no no.... Tony says that Benoit wants to keep the Horsemen alive, but Arn doesn't want to. Booker T comes out in front of Stevie Ray. They aren't communicating. Commercial. Mongo's music brings out the remaining Horsemen. Benoit's got some new tights. A four-man staredown to start. Booker tries to keep Stevie Ray away. Booker starts against Benoit, but Stevie Ray wants in. Booker reluctantly tags Stevie in. Stevie powers Benoit into the corner, but Benoit slips away and kicks Stevie down. Benoit turns around, and gets hit with a clothesline. Stevie clubs Benoit in the corner. Stevie slams Benoit, and tags Booker. Booker hits a back-elbow for two. Benoit ducks a kick, and hits a dragon-screw legwhip. Mongo tags in, and works on Booker's knee. Mongo whips Booker into the corner, and taunts Stevie Ray. Booker gets his boot up on a Mongo charge. Stevie Ray tags in, and prevents the Mongo tag. Mongo tries to fight back, but Stevie goes to the eyes. Stevie avoids a Mongo running kick, and slams Mongo. Booker tags in, and hits the Flying Burrito. Mongo eats a spinebuster from Booker. Benoit makes the save, and Stevie Ray sends him outside. Bret Hart comes down, and nails Booker T with a chair??? Mongo makes the cover, and gets the pin. That was odd.In the back, Jericho is arguing about the Dragon's title shot. Malenko runs in and starts beating the tar out of Jericho. Dragon tries to get involved, and Malenko beats him up, too, while Jericho escapes.

As we come back, one of the band members is announcing "The Eric Bischoff Show" Bischoff comes out with Liz. Why do I have a bad feeling about this? The camera pans over to a "Tonight Show"-like set. Oh my. The crowd is booing soundly. No good can come of this. The band leader is praising Bischoff. The band leader is also rambling about something. Bischoff says that they have a special guest tonight. It's Scott Steiner. Oh my. I swear, it looks like Steiner has a basketball implanted in his biceps. Steiner says he feels as good as he looks. Steiner could pass a "Matchbox" car through his arm veins. Bischoff wants to talk about Malone and DDP. Bischoff is still trying to fool us into thinking that Steiner has some sort of Hollywood career. Steiner doesn't have a high opinion of Malone. The crowd doesn't sound happy. Aldo D., how bad does this suck? Steiner says he has a guy who's as genetically gifted as he is, and as big a star as him, who'll costar with him. Steiner promises to bring this guy to the "Eric Bischoff Show" next week. Does that mean that there'll be another one of these? That's 15 minutes of my life I'll never have back. WCW needs to learn that these non-wrestling "things" don't go over real well with the WCW audience. Of course, on RAW right now, they've got some fool boxing thing going on, so I suppose things could be worse.

Mean Gene calls out Booker T Booker says he's not worried about he and Stevie Ray, he's worried about Bret Hart. Booker says that Hart is a punk. Stevie Ray comes out, and asks why Booker is issuing challenges. Booker challenges Hart to a match. Stevie tells Booker to go take care of Hart right now, instead of making challenges. Booker says he wants Hart in the middle of the ring. Hart comes out, and waves at them. Hart: "Go ahead and 'ax' me." Hart says that if Booker wants a match, as long as Booker doesn't cry when he loses. Hart says that he'll see Booker in San Diego, and Booker should bring the belt. Stevie is livid that Booker didn't jump Hart right then, and tells him to go back and put on his "shirt and tie, and seersucker pants."

In the back, Hogan isn't happy that Malone and Page aren't here. Hogan says "I know what we're going to do now."

The Nitro Girls come out, with "the Tampa Bay girl herself," Whisper, getting a solo.

Match 10: WCW United States Heavyweight Champion Bill Goldberg pinned Glacier with the Jackhammer Michael Buffer is in the ring, announcing our main event. Goldberg? I bet this'll be the only time Jerry Flynn gets a Michael Buffer intro.... My bad, it's actually Glacier. Same theory holds true. Glacier avoids a lockup, and dances around. Tony tells us that DDP and Malone are pulling up now. Goldberg takes Glacier down. Glacier with and armtwist, but Goldberg puts the anklelock on. Tony says that DDP/Malone aren't actually here yet, but "in the general area." Glacier with a kick, and a legsweep. Glacier works on Goldy in the corner. Goldberg shakes it off, and delivers a modified spinebuster to Glacier. Big spear. Jackhammer. Splat. Win. Sign: "I'm A Gold Digger."

As we return, the announcers say that the arrival of Malone/DDP is "imminent" nWo music comes on, and Hogan and Bischoff walk to the ring. Hogan doesn't look happy. Bischoff tells Malone to "bite" him. Hogan says that because DDP/Malone didn't show up tonight, he'll sic Rodzilla on them at the Bash. We see the truck driving up to the building. Hogan talks some more smack, calling them "losers." Outside, the nWo is waiting for the truck with the crowbars, etc. The rig is honking, and threatens to run the nWo over. The heels scatter, as DDP and Malone come out with chairs. Hogan's still rambling. We see DDP/Malone hitting the arena. They run down the aisle with their chairs. Malone and Page slap chairs to get the heels' attention. Hogan hides behind Bischoff, and shoves Bischoff into Page. Page sends Bischoff out, and Malone is asking for Hogan to attack. Hogan tries to escape, and Malone blocks his path. The trash starts hitting the ring. Hogan removes his do-rag.