IMPACT

August 9, 2007
Universal Studios, Orlando, Florida
thanks to: pwtorch.com
 

They open with Leticia in a rodeo clown outfit interviewing Jim Cornette in his office while Matt Morgan stood by Cornette's side sporting a suit and sunglasses. Team 3D interrupted and said it's a good thing Perverted Justice isn't here with Leticia looking like a 12-year old boy hanging around with Cornette. Ray cut a promo on Cornette about the tag titles, then Cornette snapped back that he's not making a decision about the TNA Tag Titles until after the PPV. Cornette blew them off and headed to the Impact zone to make an announcement of his own. Ray looked at Leticia and called her a tramp.

They went to a recap of last week's show before going live to the Impact zone where Mike Tenay and Don West plugged Pacman Jones making his debut interview tonight. Live in the ring, Cornette announced a six-man tag match as the main event of Hard Justice. Suddenly, Christian Cage's music hit and Christian led A.J. Styles and Tomko to the ring. Christian said he heard that Cornette is booking a six-man tag match, which isn't really his bag. He claimed to be the true World Hvt. champion. (That seems like ages ago when he held the belt.) Christian then said everyone in the world is wondering when he gets his shot at the belt that he never really lost. Cornette said that's valid, but Christian needs to be worried about his own life with Abyss going after him. Cornette then announced Abyss's match: Doomsday Chamber of Blood match. Christian didn't know what to make of it. Cornette booked it: six sides of steel cage match with barbed wire wrapped around the top and someone must bleed before he can be pinned, and the winner of the match will get the TNA Hvt. Title shot at the September PPV.

Christian cut a promo back on Cornette that Sting, Abyss, and Martin don't have a set to come out here to announce their own match, and they sent Cornette out to tell them. Predictably, the lights went out, then came back on with the babyface trio standing behind Christian's group. A brawl ensued with the babyfaces getting the best of Christian's group.

They cut backstage where Kurt Angle was moping around backstage. Jeremy Borash approached Angle and wanted to know what was going on. Angle said he just got off the phone with his divorce attorney and he lost everything . He needed a hug. Borash embraced him while Angle comically moaned and cried. Borash quizzed Angle on the last time he had a bath, then Angle snapped back that he's heartless. Angle needed Kevin Nash to help him out.

Tenay and West said they have a House of Fun random gimmick match for Raven tonight. And Samoa Joe has a shocking guest. Tenay then talked about TNA's exclusive signing of "the most controversial figure in sports". Barry Bonds? Nope, Pacman Jones. They cut to a Jones video promo. He said nobody knows who he is. He did a voice over about coming to Hard Justice. They showed some shadow boxing action shots. He closed with, "Redemption".

That's waaaaaaaaaaaay too much activity for one opening segment with not everything sinking in. Good Lord, they need to slow down or get those two hours.

[Commercial Break]

They came back and Tenay plugged Pacman Jones showing up at Hard Justice to reveal all the details of his new career. They broke down the Hard Justice card.

[Q2]

1 -- RAVEN & JAMES STORM (w/Ms. Jackie Moore) & ROBERT ROODE (w/Ms. Brooks) vs. KAZ & JAMES STORM & RHINO -- House of Fun match

Raven came out alone to start things off. Storm and Roode came out, then Kaz led out the babyface team. The heels jumped him in the aisle, though. Chris Harris then came out and Rhino followed out to officially start the match. Tenay plugged the text messaging while Roode stomped on Rhino in the corner. Raven then took five or six trashcan shots to the head from Harris. Storm slowly approached Harris, then the former AMW partners exchanged trashcan lid shots to the head. Raven came up bleeding heavily from his forehead. Raven then came off the top rope with an elbow smash on Kaz through a table. The move was sponsored by Supabad. Rather ironic.

[Commercial Break]

They came back with Kaz making a miraculous recovery to go for a suicide dive on the outside, only to take a trashcan lid shot to the head. Back in the ring, Storm brought numb chucks into the ring and tried to do some karate moves in front of Rhino, but Rhino chased him away. Back in the ring, Kaz kicked a chair into Roode's face before Raven caned him with a Kendo stick. Harris then nailed a double clothesline on Raven and Storm. On the outside, Brooks subdued Harris. Back in the ring, Kaz gave Raven a martial arts kick through a table. Kaz then turned around and took a sledgehammer shot to the gut from Roode. He followed with the Pay off - fisherman suplex - on Kaz for the win.

WINNERS: Raven & Roode & Storm in 10:00. All fine and dandy if you enjoy that style of wrestling, but I didn't get a sense that they were building up PPV matches. Roode is fighting Young, who wasn't in the mix. We saw enough of Raven vs. Kaz to get a meal instead of an appetizer. They didn't focus on Rhino vs. Storm and their bar room brawl. It was just a matter of getting six men in the ring and having a TV fight. (*1/4)

They quickly cut backstage where Leticia had changed into a different outfit. She was standing outside of Samoa Joe's locker room. She knocked on the door, then peeked in and gasped. She told us we would not want to miss Joe's special guest.

[Commercial Break]

[Q3]

They showed a video package on Black Reign (Dustin Rhodes) coming to Hard Justice to face Chris Harris. It's like Garth Brooks's alter-ego.

Backstage, Kevin Nash was on the couch while Kurt Angle cried about losing everything. Nash jumped off the couch and snapped at Angle that he's Kurt Angle. He's a genetic god. Perfect! Absolutely perfect! Angle unconvincingly said that's right. My name is Kurt Angle and people like me. Borash then interjected that Samoa Joe has a special guest. Angle started crying, not wanting any part of it. Borash whispered in Nash's ear who the guest is. Nash became agitated and said Angle doesn't need that. Angle continued to cry.

2 -- HOMICIDE & RICK STEINER vs. BROTHER DEVON & KIP JAMES (w/Roxy LaVeaux)

Homicide came out to new babyface-friendly theme music. The match started with Homicide taking down Kip with a head scissors, sending Kip to his corner. Rick then tagged in while Tenay and West talked about the media frenzy surrounding Pacman Jones. They cut to a break with the heels working on Rick.

[Commercial Break]

They aired a video package on Pacman Jones again. Back to the match, Devon hit a jaw breaker on Rick. Devon then missed with a clothesline and Rick landed an overhead slam. Homicide then took a hot tag and ran over Kip, who also tagged in. Homicide took Kip to the corner for punches, but Devon went for a corner move of sorts and hit no one. Kip then "accidentally" clotheslined Devon over the top rope to the floor. Devon then tripped Homicide from the floor, allowing Kip to hit the Fameasser on Homicide for the win. After the match, the action broke down with the remaining tag partners hitting the ring.

WINNERS: Kip & Devon in 9:00. Sloppy match fit more for a fight on bingo night than in a wrestling ring. A casual, former, or non-fan tuning in to see what this TNA promotion is all about with the Pacman Jones signing probably wasn't impressed by the "action" here. (1/2*)

Backstage, Leticia congratulated Samoa Joe on his special guest tonight. Joe said he's going to illustrate a point on all being fair in love and marriage. He said he ruined Angle's marriage last week; now he's ruining his life. Leticia asked Joe about Team 3D's comments earlier in the night. Joe said he's not hard to find, so come knock on his door. He'll be waiting for you.

[Q4]

[Commercial Break]

Samoa Joe came to the ring sporting the tag belts and X Division Title. Joe presented his special guest: the lovely and vivacious former Mrs. Kurt Angle. She walked to the ring, then Joe invited Karen to sit ringside at Hard Justice to see the ass-kicking Kurt has deserved for a long time. Angle's music interrupted and he dragged himself and his title belts to the ring, looking like a broken down man. Angle stepped into the ring after asking Joe to step aside so he could talk to his wife. He said the last 12 years wasn't the real Kurt Angle. He said he knows he treated her and their kids wrong. Angle said he wants to make it better. He wants another chance. Sounds like the Benoit story. Angle got on his knees and begged for another chance. Tenay said it's the emotional breakdown of Kurt Angle. Karen said she wants to believe Kurt, then the fans shouted at Karen not to believe Kurt. Angle pulled the "do it for the kids" line to take him back. Karen feigned taking Kurt back, but said the marriage is over... for the kids. Angle collapsed to the mat and Joe rubbed it in by saying he's receiving tremendous pleasure in Angle's misfortune. And he's the babyface? Or am I missing something? Angle cried while seated on his fanny, then Joe said he'll be coming for the IWGP Title and TNA World Title from Angle at Hard Justice. Joe closed with a thought that Angle will be broken at the PPV.

Before Joe could celebrate too long, Team 3D interrupted. He said Joe is nothing but a home wrecker. Ray said Angle tried hard to get his wife back and he's a good man. He said Joe stole something from Team 3D, and now they're taking them back. Ray told Joe to lay the belts down and leave like a good little Samoan boy. Joe took the belts and placed them down on the mat before yanking the mic away from Ray. He said he put the belts down, but it's going to be difficult for Ray to pick them up, boy. A fight ensued with Joe getting the best of Team 3D until Angle snapped to attention and slapped the anklelock on Joe. Team 3D then whipped Joe with the tag belts while Angle tried to snap Joe's ankle. Devon then brought a chair into the ring and smashed the chair over Joe's head. As usual, Joe, and his hubris, was one-upped. The Steiners then hit the ring and made the save for Joe while clearing Team 3D from the ring. Joe made a quick recovery from the chair shot to stand tall with the Steiners.

They closed with a video package hyping the PPV matches.