IMPACT

January 18, 2007
Universal Studios, Orlando, Florida
thanks to: pwtorch.com
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We open this week with Steve Borden (Sting sans makeup) beating the tar out of James Mitchell backstage, and after hitting him with anything nearby and choking him with a chain, Sting decides that's enough and tosses him into the trunk of his rental car. I'm sure Enterprise would understand the felony kidnapping charges...

Quick recap of the fallout from Final Resolution leads us into the opening.

We get the rundown on tonight's matches from Mike Tenay and Don West before we go backstage, where "that 70's Guy" Jeremy Borash is on the scene with Team 3D. Runt tries to pass off his mistake at the PPV as "no big deal", but Devon slams him against a wall and Ray reads him the riot act, saying they've been screwed over by wrestlers, promoters, and guys who've claimed to be their friend for 10 years only to stab them in the back, but never by family. Ray tells Runt to stay in the back and out of their business or else. Devon seats Runt rather brusquely and tells him to "stay there" as we move on to the opening match.

Match 1 - LAX (Homicide and Hernandez) vs. Team 3D (NWA Tag Title Match)

Moody Jack Melendez makes his return to the Impact Zone as he introduces LAX. Team 3D employ subterfuge as they use the heel tunnel to attack LAX from behind, soon depositing both members outside the ring. Devon introduces Homicide to the guardrailas Ray bounces Hernandez off the stairs. Runt comes out to cheer his brothers on as Devon laughs off Homicide's attempts to chop him down. Devon ducks a clothesline and brings Homicide down with a front underhook suplex. Runt climbs to the top rope but is yanked down by Ray and forcefully broughtto the back. During the confusion Hernandez sneaks in and bodyslams Devon, Homicide follows with a frog splash for a 2 count. Tag to Hernandez and LAX hit dual splashes in the corner on Devon. Ray returns as LAX is still in control, Devon ducks a Hernandez splash in the corner and takes out Homicide with a flying elbow before making the hot tag to Ray. Punches for each, back body drop for Homicide, fallaway slam for Hernandez. Homicide mounts the top and hits a hurancanrana on Ray, who gets back up and almost clotheslines Homicide out of his shoes. Ray with a Rock Bottom on Hernandez for 2. Ray punches Homicide off the apron and sets up Hernandez for the "Whassup" headbutt but Moody Jack, live mic in hand, approaches the ring muttering something in Spanish. This distracts Devon enough for Homicide to push him off the top. Ray goes over to deal with Homicide and as the ref is distracted with that, Moody Jack tosses a slapjack to Hernandez, who lays out Ray with it then scores the pin.

Winners: LAX

Backstage with JB, Abyss looks unhappy, as he's doing some informal redecoration of a backstage area. He hurtles a garbage can at the camera as we go to commercial.

(commercial)

We're back and we have a brawl in the ladies room between Gail Kim and Jacqueline, now to be known as Ms. Tennessee per James Storm's order. 3 security guards and Borash break it up.

Tenay and West discuss more PPV happenings and the ladies brawl which segues into Christy Hemme's promo during the PPV. Highlights of her promo are interspersed with segments of a pretaped spot where she and Borash discuss her opinions. Hemme explains she came over from a company that wouldn't allow her to do anything and has waited for her chance here in TNA to do something without having to lay down and compromise herself. Borash says she's in a different company now but sounds like she has the same issues. Christy says that women deserve some respect and shouldn't have to lay down for anyone. Kip James interrupts her interview (and his dinner, apparently) to tell Christy that before she goes up the ladder she needs to "go down", using the DX crotch chop for emphasis. Christy yells at him causing him to "accidentally" flip his catering meal at her, setting her off even further before BG James comes in to stop Kip from being a bigger dick to her, figuratively speaking.

Christian Cage, minus Tomko, comes out to address his new #1 contender, Kurt Angle. Cage goes over all of Angle's qualifications, including being "the biggest a--hole I've ever met" which inexplicably triggers Angle's entrance music. Angle walks out and gets right up into Christian's mix, advising him against further name-calling since Cage's "life partner" isn't there to provide backup for him. Angle cuts Cage off and advises him to take the belt home, shine it up, and sleep with it because after the next PPV it'll belong to him, and there's nothing Cage can do about it, emphasizing the point by spitting in Christian's face. Cage hits the wipers and tells Angle that's the confidence that makes them champions, but what separates himself from Angle is the ability to control his emotions, hinting he has a "consultant" to aid him with this, someone who knows Angle quite well. Angle admits he'll take the bait and wants to know who it is, throwing out the names of Goldberg and Brock Lesnar as guesses. Cage isn't giving up the goods, so Angle tells him if he's trying to press his buttons it worked and punches Cage. Both men swap punches until Angle ducks a punch and hits Christian with a German Suplex. Angle quickly moves in for the Angle Lock but Cage scurries out of the ring before the damage can be done.

More footage of Sting's attack on Mitchell. They are now at the prison, and as Sting tosses Mitchell against the fence we go to a commercial.

(commercial)

Very good promo for Against All Odds, focusing solely on Christian Cage.

The interrogation of Mitchell continues as Sting wants to know what Abyss is hiding. Mitchell offers up Abyss' real name and how long he was in prison for but no further specifics, deeming it none of Sting's business. Sting ramps up the assault further as he says that he's making it his business. Mitchell tells Sting that Abyss was garbage before Mitchell found him, and will be afterwards because Mitchell is just using him as a meal ticket. Sting tells Mitchell that he sees a human being where Mitchell sees a monster. Sting cuffs Mitchell to the fence and says he's going to find the answers.

Eye Spy is backstage, Alex Shelley is back behind the camera and wants to know from Kevin Nash what's next. Before Nash can answer Shelley gives Borash his business card and JB says he'll have something for him next week. Nash says he's ready for the guys to leave the nest, but Jay Lathal and Sonjay Dutt aren't so sure. Nash suggests an "Extreme Makeover" for them, which seems to placate them. Austin Starr busts in and attacks Senshi, Starr gets the early jump but Senshi comes back and almost takes off Starr's head with a punch, instead punching through a PCS box. Both men continue the fight before Dutt and Lethal break them up.

Mr. Big Voice is back, promising us "the Estrogen War contnues" as Ms. Tennessee makes her Impact debut with James Storm up next.

(commercial)

Kurt Angle is in Jim Cornette's office wanting to know what Christian is up to. Cornette tells Angle not to let Cage's mind games affect him as he has A.J. Styles to worry about later on tonight. Cornette and Borash leave as Angle stews.

Match 2 - Lance Hoyt vs. James Storm (w/ Ms. Tennessee)

Greatest Camera Shot Ever leads into Hoyt's intro. Hoyt spies Dale Torborg and A.J. Pierzynski sitting front row and isn't pleased. Clips of Pierzynski's interference at Hoyt's Final Resolution pre-show match are shown, which is more than we ever saw on Impact of the A.J./ David Eckstein confrontation from Turning Point. Storm takes advantage of Hoyt's distraction to jump him before the bell, but Hoyt quickly shrugs him off. Hoyt won't fall for the heel handshake either as he catches Storm's foot before dropping him with a short clothesline. Hoyt goes to the top for a moonsault but Storm pushes the ref into the ropes, crotching Hoyt in the corner. As Hoyt crumples to the mat, Ms. Tennessee gets a couple shots in, then Storm, who's now outside the ring, delivers a running kick to Hoyt's head. Storm puts on the cowboy hat and does the corner punches, then whips Hoyt to the opposite corner. Storm follows in with a Bronco Buster attempt but nobody's home. Torborg and A.J. have now left their seats and move in towards the ring (good luck with THAT, average TNA ticket-buying fan) as Hoyt levels Storm with a big boot. Torborg distracts Hoyt, Ms. Tennessee (who spent half the match, minimum, on the ring apron) distracts the referee, and Hoyt, who had Storm up on his shoulders, is waylaid by Pierzynski with a chair shot. Storm nails Hoyt with a superkick and the referee (who was somehow occupied for a full 23 seconds by my count) counts the pinfall.

Winner - James Storm

Post-match sees Gail Kim come down to get another piece of Ms. Tennessee while Torborg runs Hoyt into the ringpost. Storm punches (yes, punches) Kim twice before pressing her into the ring. As Torborg and Pierzynski kick Hoyt while he's down, Storm hits a swinging neckbreaker on Kim. As A.J. autographs Hoyt's forehead, Petey Williams rushes down to save Gail Kim. He lays some punches in on Storm, then grabs a hold of Ms. Tennessee, in what I can only assume was an attempt at a Canadian Destroyer. Storm runs over for the save but Petey gives him a kick to the mid-section and sets him up for it instead, only to be felled by a low blow by Ms. Tennessee, then Storm gathers himself to superkick Petey's lights out while security continue to enjoy their unfortunately timed coffee break.

JB is backstage in front of A.J. Styles's locker room. Eric Young shows up and tells JB his "friend" is off his pills and next week they can go shopping "for condos." JB suggests maybe he means condoms and EY says they can get some of those also. A.J. shoos Eric away and talks about his upcoming match with Angle tonight. After suggesting Angle's had everything handed to him, A.J. gives Angle's gold medal accomplishment a "whoop-de-doo" and mentions he won a blue ribbon in the triple jump. Funny stuff.

(commercial)

Sting has just arrived at the Impact Zone, with Leticia and her cameraman in hot pursuit. We're supposed to hear from him later, which renders both interviewer AND cameraman obsolete since he'll be in the center of the ring with access to a mic and every camera inside the Impact Zone. You wonder if they even try sometimes...

Match 3 - Kurt Angle vs. A.J. Styles

Dream Match 2004 starts off with Kurt moving in to shoot the leg, but A.J. sidesteps him, causing A.J. to jump in fits of glee. Styles moves in to shoot a leg but Angle goes behind A.J. and lays in the paintbrush slaps something fierce. An embarrassed Styles gets up right into the path of a pair of Angle clotheslines. European uppercut and some boots to follow, but A.J. buys time with an eyerake. Angle reverses a whip into the ropes and dumps A.J. with a belly-to-belly suplex. As Angle beats A.J. down into the corner, Tomko comes out to ringside. Angle with an overhead suplex for A.J. and invites Tomko in for a closer look, giving A.J. an opening to kick the rope Angle was standing over, and as Angle crumples to the ringside floor, we go to commercial.

(commercial)

A.J. has Angle back in the ring controlled with a rear facelock. Angle elbows out, but an A.J. enziguiri takes Angle back down. A.J. off the top rope connects with a flying forearm for a 2 count. Tomko distracts the referee allowing A.J. to sneak out to procure a chair. A.J. brings down the chair but hits nothing but mat, and Angle gets up and hits A.J. with the Olympic Slam onto the chair. The referee breaks away from Tomko long enough to make the three count.

Winner: Kurt Angle

Post-match, Angle chases Tomko up the ramp, and as he leads him back to the ring, Cage attacks Angle from behind. All 3 men are now beating down Angle in the ring before Rhino comes down to get another piece of Styles, both men fight out of the ring leaving Angle alone with Cage and Tomko, who get afew more shots in before Samoa Joe, chair in hand, sends Christian and Tomko heading for higher ground. Cage tells Angle there's his clue, insinuating that Joe might be his "consultant", and as Joe and Angle stare each other down Security return from their self-imposed exile to keep the two apart.

"Adrenaline Rush" recap to close out the show, except it's not quite over yet...

Sting's got a mic and calls Abyss out to the ring. Abyss comes out and gets in Sting's face, Sting tells him he needs to start talking about what he'd done because Sting wants answers. Sting even gives him a mic, but Abyss still isn't talking. Hopefully his first word is a little more meaningful than Maggie Simpson's. Finally Sting gives up and says it's on public record so he'll go find out for himself. And that's a wrap...